Women in ancient Rome

In ancient Rome, freeborn women were citizens, but they could not vote or hold political office. Because they had limited roles in public life, Roman historians often wrote about men more than women. However, women from wealthy or powerful families could still have influence by talking and negotiating privately.

Some women became very famous and important in history. For example, Lucretia and Claudia Quinta were remembered in myths, while Cornelia, mother of the Gracchi, and Fulvia even led armies and had their pictures on coins. In the time of the emperors, women like Livia and Agrippina the Younger helped shape the customs of the empire. Later, the empress Helena played a big role in spreading Christianity.

While most women did not have much power in public life, they did have an important job in religion. The Vestals were special priestesses who could not marry for thirty years. They studied and performed important rituals to keep Rome safe.

Childhood and education

In ancient Rome, a child's life depended on their family's social status. Children played many games, and their toys have been found by archaeologists. Girls and boys played similar games, like ball and hoop-rolling. Dolls, usually made from wood, terracotta, bone, or ivory, were popular with girls and were often dedicated to the goddess Diana or Venus when girls reached adulthood.

Girls were expected to protect their modesty and reputation in preparation for marriage, which often happened very early, sometimes as young as 12 for noble girls. Education for girls was usually limited to basic schooling, though some from wealthy families received more learning. Both boys and girls took part in religious festivals and learned good behavior by watching adults. Elite girls were sometimes well-educated, but for most, learning focused on skills needed for marriage and managing a household.

Women in the family and law

See also: Pater familias

Both daughters and sons were under the control of their father, who was the head of the household. In early Roman times, daughters had similar rights to sons if their father passed away without a will. Daughters were often valued just as much as sons, even though sons were expected to carry on the family’s public roles.

Roman fathers arranged marriages for their daughters, usually when they were quite young. Girls could legally agree to marry at age 12, and boys at 14. Many noble girls married even younger for political reasons. Most women married in their late teens or early twenties. A daughter could refuse a marriage if she felt the future husband was not trustworthy.

When a woman married, she did not come under her husband’s legal control. Instead, she stayed under her father’s authority, which gave Roman women more freedom compared to women in many other ancient cultures. Even though she had to respect her father’s wishes, she was not watched over closely in her daily life. A daughter kept her family name throughout her life, a tradition that continues in some countries today, like Spain or Italy. Children usually took their father’s name, but sometimes they could also use their mother’s name.

Women and sexuality

From the start of the Roman Republic, there was a strong focus on a woman's purity. Chastity was an important virtue, and Roman women were expected to remain faithful to their husbands. After marriage, women were closely watched to ensure they did not engage in any behavior that could be seen as improper.

During the reign of Augustus, the emphasis on a woman's role as a faithful wife and mother grew even stronger. New laws were created to encourage healthy family relationships, rewarding those who were married and had children, and punishing those who were unmarried or childless. These laws also enforced the punishment of wives who were unfaithful.

Roman women had some rights and could own land, write their own wills, and appear in court. Some women even spoke in court to defend themselves or others, showing their ability to argue strongly. Despite these opportunities, women's roles were still limited compared to men, and they were often seen mainly as wives and mothers.

Family tomb inscriptions suggest that the ideal Roman marriage was one of mutual loyalty, where husband and wife shared interests, activities, and property.

In the earliest period of the Roman Republic, a bride passed from her father's control into the "hand" of her husband. This meant she became subject to her husband's authority, though not as much as their children. Over time, this strict form of marriage changed, and by the time of Julius Caesar, women often stayed under their father's authority even after marrying. This gave Roman women more independence compared to women in many other ancient cultures.

Marriage ceremonies were not always required, but they helped prove that a couple had decided to live together. Different types of marriages existed, such as those symbolized by sharing bread, or those based on mutual agreement to live together. Divorce was possible and became more common over time, especially among the wealthy.

Remarriage was common among Roman elites. After the death of a spouse, it was customary for a woman to wait ten months before marrying again. This waiting period helped ensure that any child born during that time would have a clear father. Women with assets often had a say in choosing their new husbands.

Concubinage, or living with someone who was not a legal spouse, was also accepted in Roman society. It was common when social differences made marriage difficult. Children from such relationships took on their mother's social status.

Roman law did not allow abuse by a husband toward his wife, though such laws did not always prevent it. Good husbands were expected to treat their wives with respect.

Roman women were expected to have children, but many wealthy women chose not to breastfeed their own children and hired wet-nurses instead. Despite this, breastfeeding was still seen as an ideal practice. Large families were not common among the wealthy, which led the first Roman emperor Augustus to create laws to encourage more children. These laws offered special honors to women who had at least three children.

Roman mothers played an important role in raising and educating their children. A well-educated mother was seen as key to helping her children become good citizens. Notable Roman mothers, like Cornelia, the mother of the Gracchi, and Aurelia, the mother of Julius Caesar, were influential in their sons' lives and political careers.

Daily life

Aristocratic women managed large households, which could be like running a small business. They took care of guests, clients, and visitors, and often made business decisions when their husbands were away. For example, Julius Caesar's wife took care of his assets while he was away, and Ovid's wife held onto their property when he was exiled.

One important task for women was overseeing clothing production. Spinning wool was a key domestic job, showing a family's self-sufficiency. Women of all classes were expected to spin and weave, and this skill was shown on funeral monuments. Women also participated in business, lending money, funding public works, and managing estates. They could own property and engage in business transactions, though some jobs were seen as more respectable than others. In Pompeii, many women had various professions, from business to crafts to services.

Slavery

Free women who were once slaves but gained freedom were called freedwomen. They still had to help their former owners for a while, and those owners had to help them in return. This relationship was very important in ancient Rome.

Like women who were born free, freedwomen had similar rights. However, because slaves did not have fathers, freedwomen could not inherit property unless someone wrote them into their will.

The connection between a freedwoman and her former owner could be tricky. For example, a woman named Petronia Iusta tried to prove she was born free, even though her mother had been a slave. There was a disagreement about whether she owed service to her mother’s former owners, but no clear proof existed.

Some freedwomen held important positions. Caenis, for example, was a freedwoman and worked as a secretary for Emperor Vespasian. Though they lived together faithfully, she was not considered his wife.

See also: Slavery in ancient Rome and Ancient Roman freedmen

!Left image: A young woman sits while a servant fixes her hair with the help of a cupid, who holds up a mirror to offer a reflection, detail of a fresco from the Villa of the Mysteries, Pompeii, c. 50 BC !Right image: A floor mosaic of a woman dancer from the Villa Romana del Casale, 4th century AD

Prostitution

Main article: Prostitution in ancient Rome

Some women in ancient Rome turned to prostitution to take care of themselves. Even women who were slaves could sometimes gain something from this work. In Roman law, slaves were seen as property, so forcing a slave woman into prostitution was not considered a crime. Over time, laws changed to protect some slaves from being forced into this role.

Wealthy and powerful women could also end up in prostitution, sometimes as a form of punishment. For example, a law allowed women guilty of certain serious actions to be required to work in brothels, though this law was later removed.